12個比你更成功的人永遠不會告訴你的秘密

????他們會推掉所有不必要的無用工作；他們不斷挑戰極限，刺激自己學習；他們會創造直觀的提醒方式，讓自己時刻專注于長期目標。悉心閱讀本文闡述的12個成功錦囊，你一定會有所收獲，但最重要的是，你得馬上行動起來！

????維維克?拉杰在Quora上的回答

????他們總是以平靜的心態迎接嶄新的一天。

????太多關于個人成功的書籍和課程，似乎將我們看作機器人，完全忽視了人類情感的巨大力量。我們在一天開始的時候，情緒越平靜，就越容易在全天保持平靜的心態。因為，如果我們在平靜的狀態中迎接嶄新的一天，我們就很容易保持專注，完成該做的事情。

????如果我們早上一醒來便面臨鋪天蓋地的壓力——電話鈴聲、電子郵件和短信提示音、火警警報等——你一整天都會處于被動響應的狀態，而不是積極主動。這意味著當你想去做那些推動你邁向成功的優先事務時，你卻無法掌握主動權，你只是在被動應付別人塞給你的事情，根本沒有考慮這些事情是否重要。

????每天的第一個小時，盡量不要有太多變化。值得信賴的晨間規劃能夠極其有效地幫助你找到自我控制的感覺，讓你不會陷入被動反應的狀態，進而可以減輕緊張與壓力，使你更加警覺，更有能力做好自己的工作。務必要記住，你以什么樣的狀態開始一天的工作，對你的總體工作效率有著巨大的影響。

????他們會推掉所有不必要的無用工作。

????有時候，我們都會想：“我們為什么不可能將所有事情做完？”答案其實非常簡單：我們做了太多錯誤的事情。

????許多研究發現，人們盲目地拿出更多時間去解決不斷出現的各種事情，這導致他們從來都不可能完成更多工作。相反，如果他們按照精心制定的計劃，測量和跟蹤關鍵優先事項與里程碑事件，工作效率反而會更高。所以，如果你希望自己更加成功，減少壓力，不要問如何提高做某件事的效率，首先要問的是“我真的有必要做這件事嗎？”

????你能把某件事做好，并不意味著這件事該由你去完成。我認為這正是大多數時間管理建議普遍存在的一個問題；工作效率大師們往往只關注如何快速把事情做完，但事實上，在人們快速完成的事務中，大多數根本沒有必要去做。

????仔細想想，這其實有些諷刺——一方面，我們在抱怨時間太少，另一方面我們在安排工作優先順序的時候，又似乎有著用不完的時間。因此，盡量專注于真正重要的事情，不要被其他瑣事干擾。

????他們會做完必須要做的事，在24小時以內！

????幾乎每個人都在談論這個問題，但成功人士會將其付諸行動。我曾經說過，現在我還要再說一遍：你是否擁有高智商和量子物理學的博士學位并不重要，因為如果你不行動起來，你在現實世界中便無法改變任何事情或取得任何進步。知與行之間有著巨大差異。沒有行動，知識和智慧便毫無用處。就是這么簡單。

????成功人士知道，今天執行的一個好計劃，比未來某天才能執行的完美計劃更有價值。他們不會等待“合適的時間”或“合適的日期”或“合適的（不可能的）環境”，因為他們知道這些反應都是源自于恐懼。他們會立刻行動起來——因為只有這樣，才會真正有所進步。

????他們會逐漸將人生的困境變成優勢。

????許多最著名的小說、歌曲和發明都是受到了極度痛苦和傷心往事的啟發。因此，面對諸多挑戰不要灰心，因為它們可能成為史詩巨作誕生的催化劑。

????一個名為“創傷后成長”的心理學新興領域認為，許多人可以利用他們所經歷的艱辛和創傷，獲得大幅度的創造力與智力發展。研究人員發現，創傷尤其有助于人們發展人際關系、滿足感、感恩、個人能力和隨機應變能力。

????我們可能將這個世界看作是一個安全或者其他類型的地方，一旦這種世界觀破碎，我們將不得不重新樹立對外界的觀點。我們突然有機會像新生兒一樣，從嶄新的角度來看待外面的世界。而這種經歷有利于個人成長和長期成功。

????他們不斷挑戰極限，刺激自己學習。

????當你挑戰自身極限，走出之前的舒適區時，你才會學到更多。

????當然，養成好的習慣很重要?！靶牧鳌蓖瑯又匾?。但這兩種都不是最好的學習方式。有時候，你需要挑戰自己的能力極限。這個過程會有些辛苦和不舒服。但這正是人類大腦成長的方式。只有走出舒適區，我們才會有所得。

????你陷入掙扎時，正是你變得更強大和更聰明的時候。你在非舒適區的時間越長，學習速度便越快。效率極高的十分鐘，也好過碌碌無為的一個小時。在這種狀態下，你可以提高自己的能力，不斷挑戰自身極限，犯錯誤，跌倒，從錯誤中學習，然后繼續挑戰更高的極限。

????在面臨艱難決定時，他們相信自己的直覺。

????直覺是非常真實的，凡是聰明人都不應忽略它的作用，因為它源自我們潛意識深處，來源于你之前的生活經歷。如果所有人都告訴你“是”，但你的直覺卻給出了相反的答案，其中肯定有充分的理由。在面對艱難決策的時候，找出你可以找到的所有信息，讓自己盡可能全面了解情況，然后讓上天給予你的直覺做出決定。

????成功人士知道，相信自己的直覺便等于相信真實的自我；你對真實的自我越信任，你便可以更好地控制實現目標與夢想的過程。

????他們謹慎地專注于積極面。

????肖恩??？茽栐谒臅犊鞓犯偁幜Α罚═he Happiness Advantage）中寫道，最近一項科學研究發現，相比處在中性情緒狀態的醫生，在診斷之前調整為積極情緒的醫生，始終能體會到知識能力的顯著提高，使他們將準確診斷的時間縮短約20%。研究人員隨后對其他職業進行的研究發現，樂觀的銷售人員業績比悲觀的同行超出50%。在數學考試之前感覺高興的學生，考試成績顯著高于處在中性情緒的同學。因此，我們的情緒似乎只有在積極的狀態下才會發揮最佳的效果，而不是處于消極或中性狀態之下。

????當然，這并不是說成功人士從來不心煩，但如果你能謹慎地接受和釋放負面情緒，而不是深陷其中，你便可以顯著提高生活中各方面的效率?；ǜ俚男乃既タ紤]如何解決你的問題，花更多的心思考慮如何管理自己的心態。始終保持積極心態。

????他們創造直觀的提醒方式，讓自己時刻專注于長期目標。

????你想減肥，但當你累了的時候，你很容易找到合理的借口，讓鍛煉以及合理飲食從明天再開始。你想要建立一家盈利的公司，但當你陷入日?，嵤碌臅r候，你很容易傾向于做自己熟悉的事情，而不是公司成長需要你去做的事情。你想要培養最親密的關系，但當你忙碌的時候，你很容易找到理由說自己真的需要解決客戶的提案。

????美好的事物不會輕易得來，當事情變得棘手，我們往往會選擇捷徑——即便這會將我們帶往錯誤的方向。

????為了避免這種情況發生，成功人士制作了直觀的提醒方式，將他們從缺乏判斷力的沖動邊緣拉回到正常軌道。我們的一位朋友在過去五年還清了約10萬美元債務，他在電腦顯示器上貼了一張信用卡余額；它可以不斷提醒自己需要償還的債務。另外一位朋友將自己比現在胖90磅的照片貼在冰箱上，提醒自己不能再成為那樣的人。還有一個人在桌子里裝滿家人的照片，一方面因為他喜歡不時翻看這些照片，另一方面，當工作變得棘手的時候，這些照片可以提醒他，他在為誰努力工作。

????你在什么時候最有可能屈服于內心的沖動，脫離實現終極目標的道路？找出這樣的時刻，然后用可視化的提醒方式來打斷這種沖動，讓你在實現目標的道路上繼續走下去。

????他們會寫日記。

????奧普拉寫日記。阿姆寫日記。J?K?羅琳也寫日記。

????成功人士都會跟蹤他們的進度，制定目標，反思自己的錯誤并從中總結經驗教訓。他們通常會將這些工作放在一本筆記本當中。在生活當中，如果你想去某個地方，你需要一張地圖，這本筆記便是你成功路上的地圖。你可以記錄自己今天做了什么，你打算實現什么目標，你犯過什么錯誤等等。你可以在這里自我反思，可以記錄重要的想法，還可以跟蹤你已經實現和計劃實現的目標。日記是對普通大眾極為有效，但未必得到最充分利用的工具之一。

????他們會為自己找一位言傳身教，答疑解惑的導師。

????不論你想實現什么目標，都不可能只靠自己去完成。從書本中學習是一個艱難的過程。有時候，互聯網讓我們很難區分真相與謊言。你需要有一位前輩來告訴你一些竅門——他可以是你的良師益友或教練。

????10,000個小時的勤奮練習可以讓你成為專家，但是什么讓你將10,000個小時投入到某件事情上？那就是一兩位優秀的導師。如果你研究過足夠成功的人的生活，你會發現，在所有領域最優秀的人——運動員、音樂家、創業者、藝術家等——都有非凡的導師、教練或榜樣，他們讓練習這件事變得很有價值，充滿意義。

????有時候，僅僅通過觀察導師也能帶來奇跡。我們在觀察一個想要學習的榜樣時，我們十分清楚自己想要成為什么樣的人，這時候你便會爆發出驚人的積極性。人類天生愿意進行社交，當我們希望加入一個高高在上的精英圈子的時候，這種想法便會推動我們實現了不起的成就?！翱?，他們做到了。我也能做到！”雖然這聽起來有些過于簡單，但拿出時間研究優秀的人，將是你為自己做的最有價值的一件事。

????他們歡迎真誠的反饋與批評。

????亞里士多德說過，“要免受批評，就別說話，別做事，別成器?！边@是一種戲謔的說法。如果你因為說話、做事或思考一些不同尋常的事情而遭到批評，這是好事。這意味著你在最近的某個時刻對某件事表明了立場。而這是成功很重要的一部分。

????追隨成功人士的腳步，學會如何有效處理批評。對于充滿惡意的負面批評，你應該在收到之后進行評估，然后將其拋到腦后，而對于建設性意見，你應該在評估之后采取行動。向你重視的人——那些曾經有過與你類似遭遇的人——尋求反饋。記住，要以親切的態度接受反饋；這樣，你周圍的人在未來才更有可能給你提供支持和誠實的見解。

????他們會控制自己的驕傲。

????最后但并非最不重要的一條……

????承認自己錯了，說聲抱歉。深知自己不可能無所不知。樹立一個偉大的夢想。承認自己的成功也要歸功于其他人。不時嘲弄自己。在有必要的時候尋求幫助。

????經歷錯誤和失敗。心甘情愿地再次嘗試。這個世界上不存在永恒的職業或絕對真理。我們都在摸索著前進。向每個人學習，保持謙遜，不要忘記享受在路上的美好時光。（財富中文網)

????這正是成功人士會做的事情。

????譯者：劉進龍/汪皓

????審校：任文科

????Answer by Vivek Raj on Quora.

????They have calm, consistent morning routines.

????Too many books and courses on personal success act like we’re robots, and completely overlook the enormous power of our emotions. The less frenzied emotions we have at the start of the day, the less we will have all day. Because when we start the day in a calm, mindful state, it’s easy to focus and get the right things done.

????But when we wake up and stress is already upon us – phones ringing, emails and texts dinging, fire alarms going off – you spend the whole day reacting, instead of being proactive. This means you’re not in the driver’s seat working on your priorities – the things that drive success – you’re simply responding to what gets thrown at you, whether it’s important or not.

????Try to have the first hour of your day vary as little as possible. A trusted routine can be extremely effective in helping you feel in control and non-reactive, which reduces anxiety and stress, and therefore makes you more mindful and competent. The bottom line is that how you start the day has an enormous effect on your overall effectiveness.

????They eliminate all needless busywork.

????At some point we all wonder, “Why is it so impossible to get everything done?” But the answer is stunningly simple: We’re doing too many of the wrong things.

????Several research studies have shown that people never get more done by blindly working more hours on everything that comes up. Instead, they get more done when they follow careful plans that measure and track key priorities and milestones. So if you want to be more successful and less stressed, don’t ask how to make something more efficient until you’ve first asked, “Do I need to do this at all?”

????Simply being able to do something well does not make it the right thing to do. I think this is one of the most common problems with a lot of time-management advice; too often productivity gurus focus on how to do things quickly, but the vast majority of things people do quickly should not be done at all.

????If you think about it, it’s actually kind of ironic that we complain we have so little time, and then we prioritize like time is infinite. So do your best to focus on what’s truly important, and not much else.

????They do what needs to be done, today!

????While everyone else is talking about it, successful people are quietly doing it. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: It doesn’t matter if you have a genius IQ and a PhD in Quantum Physics, you can’t change anything or make any sort of real-world progress without taking action. There’s a huge difference between knowing how to do something and actually doing it. Knowledge and intelligence are both useless without action. It’s as simple as that.

????Successful people know that a good plan executed today is better than a perfect plan executed someday. They don’t wait for the “right time” or the “right day” or the “right (impossible) circumstances”, because they know these reactions are based on a fear and nothing more. They take action here and now, today – because that’s where real progress happens.

????They gradually turn life’s obstacles around.

????Many of the most iconic novels, songs and inventions of all time were inspired by gut-wrenching pain and heartbreak. Therefore, the silver lining of these great challenges is that they were the catalyst to the creation of epic masterpieces.

????An emerging field of psychology called Post-Traumatic Growth has suggested that many people are able to use their hardships and traumas for substantial creative and intellectual development. Specifically, researchers have found that trauma can help people grow in the areas of interpersonal relationships, contentment, gratitude, personal strength, and resourcefulness.

????When our view of the world as a safe place, or as a certain type of place, has been shattered, we are forced to reboot our perspective on things. We suddenly have the opportunity to look out to the periphery and see things with a new, fresh set of beginner’s eyes, which is very conducive to personal growth and long-term success.

????They learn by stretching themselves to their limits.

????You learn best when you’re stretching yourself beyond your previous level of comfort.

????Sure, getting into a routine is great. “Flow” is great too. But neither is the best way to learn. You want to be stretched to the edge of your ability sometimes. It needs to be hard and uncomfortable. That’s how your brain grows. We learn when we’re in our discomfort zone.

????When you’re struggling, that’s when you’re growing stronger and smarter. The more time you spend there, the faster you learn. It’s better to spend an extremely high quality ten minutes growing, than it is to spend a mediocre hour running in place. You want to practice at the point where you are on the edge of your ability, stretching yourself over and over again, making mistakes, stumbling, learning from those mistakes and stretching yourself even farther.

????They turn to their intuition when making tough decisions.

????Intuition is very real and something that is never wise to ignore, because it comes from deep within your subconscious and is derived from your previous life experiences. If everyone else is telling you “yes” but your gut is telling you otherwise, it’s usually for a good reason. When faced with difficult decisions, seek out all the information you can find, become as knowledgeable as you possibly can, and then listen to your God-given instincts.

????Successful people know that trusting your intuition is equivalent to trusting your true self; and the more you trust your true self, the more control you have of making your goals and dreams come true.

????They mindfully focus on the positive.

????As Shawn Achordescribes in his book The Happiness Advantage, a recent scientific study showed that doctors who are put in a positive mood before making a diagnosis consistently experience significant boosts to their intellectual abilities than doctors in a neutral state, which allows them to make accurate diagnoses almost 20% faster. The same study then shifted to other vocations and found that optimistic salespeople outsell their pessimistic counterparts by over 50%. Students primed to feel happy before taking math tests substantially outperform their neutral peers. So it turns out that our minds are literally hardwired to perform at their best not when they are negative, or even neutral, but when they are positive.

????Of course, that’s not to say that successful people never get upset, but your effectiveness in all walks of life will fare better if you’re able to mindfully accept and let go of negative emotions, rather than dwelling on them. Think a little less about managing your problems and a little more about managing your mindset. Keep it positive.

????They create visual reminders of their long-term goals.

????You want to lose weight, but when you’re tired, it’s easy to rationalize that you’ll start exercising and eating right tomorrow. You want to build a more profitable business, but when you’re caught up in the daily grind, it’s easy to just do what’s familiar instead of what’s required for growth. You want to nurture your closest relationships, but when you’re busy, it’s easy to rationalize that you really need to work on that client proposal instead.

????Few good things come easy, and when the going gets tough we often take the easy way out – even though the easy way takes us the wrong way.

????To combat this, successful people create tangible reminders that pull them back from the brink of their weak impulses. A friend of ours who has paid off almost $100K of debt in the past five years has a copy of his credit card balance taped to his computer monitor; it serves as a constant reminder of the debt he wants to pay off. Another friend keeps a photo of herself when she was 90 pounds heavier on her refrigerator as a reminder of the person she never wants to be again. And another fills his desk with family photos, both because he loves looking at them and because, when work gets really tough, these photos remind him of the people he is ultimately working for.

????Think of moments when you are most likely to give in to impulses that take you farther away from your ultimate goals. Then use visual reminders of those goals to interrupt the impulse and keep you on track.

????They keep some kind of personal notebook.

????Oprah keeps a journal. Eminem keeps a journal. J.K. Rowling keeps a journal.

????Successful people track their progress, set goals, reflect, and learn from their mistakes. And they often use some kind notebook to accomplish this. If you want to get somewhere in life, you need a map, and this notebook is that map. You can write down what you did today, what you tried to accomplish, where you made mistakes, and so forth. It’s a place to reflect. It’s a place to capture important thoughts. It’s a place to be able to track where you’ve been and where you intend to go. It’s one of the most underused, yet incredibly effective tools available to the masses.

????They have mentors they observe and consult with.

????Regardless of what you’retrying to achieve, you cannot do it alone. It can be hard to learn from books. And sometimes the Internet makes it difficult to separate truth from fiction. You need someone who has been where you want to go to show you the ropes – your own personal mentor or coach.

????Yes, 10,000 hours of diligent practice can make you an expert, but what makes you dedicate 10,000 hours to something in the first place? The answer is having a great mentor or two. If you study the lives of enough successful people, it becomes obvious that most world-class performers in all fields – athletes, musicians, entrepreneurs, artists, etc. – had incredible mentors, coaches or role models who made the activity of practice worthwhile and rewarding.

????And sometimes just observing a mentor works wonders too. When we observe someone we want to learn from and we have a crystal clear idea of what we want to create for ourselves, it unlocks a tremendous amount of motivation. Human beings are socially inclined, and when we get the idea that we want to join some elite circle up above us, that is what really motivates us to achieve greatness. “Look, they did it. I can do it too!” It may sound overly simplistic, but spending time studying people who are great can be one of the most powerful things you can do for yourself.

????They welcome honest feedback and criticism.

????“To avoid criticism say nothing, do nothing, be nothing.” That’s what Aristotle said. And obviously, he was being facetious. If you are being criticized for doing, saying or thinking something that’s out of the ordinary. Good. That means you’ve taken a stand for something sometime in your life recently. And that’s a huge part of being successful.

????Follow in the footsteps of enormously successful people by learning to effectively process the criticism you receive. Hateful and negative criticism should be received, assessed, and then let go, while constructive criticism should be evaluated and acted upon. Solicit feedback from people whose opinions you value – people who have been where you want to go. And remember to be gracious when receiving feedback; when you are, all the people around you will be more likely to give you their support and honest insight in the future. (Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.)

????They keep their pride in check.

????Last but not least…

????To admit they made a mistake. To say they are sorry. To know that they can’t possibly know it all. To have big dreams. To admit they owe their success to others too. To poke fun at themselves from time to time. To ask for help when they need it.

????To make mistakes and fail. And to try again, willingly. There are no permanent jobs or absolutes on this planet. We are all just interning and exploring here. Learn from everyone, remain humble, and don’t forget to have a good time along the way.

????That’s what successful people do.